#and I will have another bad day within the week

[rotagnus]

love/self-growth in march !! 🫐

my usual pick a pile is here, darlings. pick just as usual--if it doesn't speak to you, don't force yourself to choose. there are messages for you that lie elsewhere.

this reading deals with both platonic, familial, and romantic love. don't expect to get a certain aspect of love or the result you want.

-1. ooouu you're a bright person. probably very creative with a tendency to get stuck within your own head. as for love in march, i think that this month will focus on a connection that already exists. maybe you've been working on self-love, and that's what's growing. for some of you, you've adopted a pet recently and that connection is going to grow stronger. if you're crushing on someone right now, there probably won't be any change except for your feelings growing stronger. my advice to you is to decenter this because if you focus completely on that, it'll be really terrible. you are so full of beauty and flame and wonder, and you should harness this energy and create beauty, not look for it elsewhere. time will bring you everything. you deserve a love which knows no bounds, and whether this person is it or not, you must first find that love within. i know a lot of you don't want to hear this, but it's the truth. i would highly suggest trying to talk to this person, though--to find out what they really are. ask deep questions if you're already on a talking basis with them, if not--try to make a friend.

-2. now baby tell me why you've given up on love. it seems to be a sour topic for you that you shy away from. you've done a lot of self-growth in the past ~6 months, and you're farther along on your self-discovery journey than either of these two piles are. for you, you try not to love. a lot of the times, you feel like you are still unseen. this month will bring change to that. i'm not sure what kind of change, i can't exactly tell, but you'll feel a bit more seen than you did before. this may be to personal circumstances, or maybe another person does something--even a simple action--and you realize that, damn, maybe i really am seen. this month will deal with opening up a little bit more to let the love flow in. lol, for pile 1, it's not really time for love, but for you it is; but you've closed all doors to any possible encounters with love. 🤣 listen, i highly suggest doing some exercises for your vulnerability. it's a great step forward, and i think that it could benefit you. if a person comes into your life, let them. but don't be scared to set boundaries and not settle for less.

-3. you have rose-colored glasses, darling. now, don't take this the wrong way. it can be a very great thing, being idealistic--you at your heart are a ruthless optimist and honestly, a little bit naive. you've been dealing with both ups and downs, this past couple of months. there's been some trouble in your family, and in your love life. you're always the one making ends meet in order to benefit mass sums of people. you're awfully responsible and confident, but you're still...you. you still need rest. i feel like most of you are women--babies, you do NOT need to be the men in the relationship, if you're a masculine woman, disregard this. but for a lot of you, you're stuck in this disbalanced masculine energy. i don't really like talking about the divine feminine and divine masculine and whatnot, but for you i feel like it's important. girl, put yourself FIRST. i promise you there's a man/woman/person out there who's gonna bring you flowers every damn day of the week, you just gotta put yourself first. start to say NO. you might meet someone new in march. someone unexpected. i know you've been taught that change is bad, but in this case, just wait a little bit. baby steps, darling. baby steps.

[panelshowsource]

i have a lot of episode requests i'm working on so i'll make another post with those shortly!

———

this is such a fun question — i wish i had an answer! most of my "conspiracy theories" have more to do with certain comedians being misunderstood (in both good and bad ways), as people tend to want to like who they like and hate who they hate out of selfishness that is somewhat at odds with reality. at times. like, for example, not a lot of people want to talk about how many comedians actually didn't like sean lock at all in the early 00s because of how cutthroat and competitive he was on panel shows (mock the week flashbacks, anyone?); we don't enjoy thinking about that because, as fans, we all like sean and think he was a hilarious, honest, decent person. i could talk more about this but tbh defending someone i think people misunderstand or tearing down someone people love is kinda...not the kind of discourse i'm trying to do on this website 😅 anyways, that's where most of my theories lie (that and dating theories? maybe?), but that's not enough to call them conspiracy theories ig? this isn't a conspiracy theory, right? because i so passionately believe everything i said there hahahaha

do you have any you'd share? 👀🌀

i think argumental is probably the most underrated to me, because as much as...no one...talks about shows like duck quacks don't echo and rhod gilbert's growing pains, they've had enough high-profile or just popular-within-britcom guests that people have checked them out even for just one specific episode. but i feel like no one has watched argumental!!!!!!! which, i get it, it's a lot of straight white guys standing around doing fake mainsplaining lol (please remember that before, like, 5 years ago, that's about all panel shows were) but i think the premise of impromptu debate is really funny, some of the formats really bamboozle the debaters which leads to funny banter and improv, and it was so fun to see sean lock in menace mode as host 😋

i can't say it's the best ever made or anything — because, like series like there's something about movies (jennifer saunders i love you!!!!), rob beckett's smart tv, etc it's just two opposite panels answering kinda boring questions — but if you love david tennant and i know you do because everyone rightly does then you should try comedy world cup! he's such a wonderful host and there are a lot of panel show faves as guests

and on the topic of meh-to-decent formats with A+ hosts and big name panels, have you ever tried was it something i said or insert name here? they each have their moments for sure, i think a lot of people wanted to see wisis come back (maybe we're all just obsessed with david 🤷‍♀️)

you MUST listen to the unbelievable truth if you haven't, it's such a stellar radio show

another required panel experience is the recent series guy mont spelling bee and i'm holding a gun to your head when i say this watch it and watch it right now

as many of you know i'm not a fan of a league of their own but the road trip series are def some of the better episodes so if you like the panelists you can check that out for sure

does that help a little? tbh most of what i WANT to recommend isn't panel shows but scripted series or tangential reality shows (like travel man), but you asked about panel shows specifically so i stuck with them!

i haven't, and i surprise myself because lil savage was so iconic and i am sure i scrolled past her era a bunch of times back in the day. i'd give it a try if an episode had the right amalgamation of guests, so i'll check it out!!

omg there are so many moments from so many series — and i added quite a few to these random panel shows moments posts i did last year so i'll try not to repeat myself — but let me rack my brain real quick...

as i always say THIS is my favourite wilty clip ever and i stand by that

david the tortoise

yoshi the actual tortoise

"if this turns out to be a lie you are a shamless little light entertainer"

tell 'em david!! cuz she really does have horrible views lol

the elephant :/

for the last six months i've been secretly liasing with david's wife behind his bak

obviously the horse story

omg and the THERE'S NOOOOOO UNIVERSITY story

and on the topic of classics this was always my bob mortimer fave maybe because of the genuine awe of the panel in the end lol

and on the topic of genuine awe definitely this one

this miles jupp car crash

bermuda

i love rhod's potato tattoo and it's so funny that denise is like 'why have you got that??' so sincerely she was so astounded lmaooo

i was genuinely invited to harry and megan's wedding today but i said no because i had to come here and do this

i once shared a tent in kent with susie dent

another recent fave is this adorable one<3

oh man anon there are soooo many more maybe i can work on a masterpost of both funny moments funny whole lies/truths, or a youtube video or something (i said i'd get back into making videos). did i mention even one of your faves?? hehehe

omg anon you must watch this if you haven't the ben whishaw obsession is NOT a drill

he also talks about it in his book!

god he's so relatable

OMG I DID the nostalgia...

the way they didn't want to just talk about popworld but they didn't go one whole minute without saying popworld hahahaha they're soooooo cute

richard the popworld horse mentioned!!!!!!!

miquita being a whole child when she got cast for popworld, like it's so wild to think about

"has it been clear from what we've discussed that i'm a reclusive genius and master of cinema?" + "we pretended to be pretentious directors in berets...and i have become that guy now"

i know they were 98% kidding but the 2% of them that would go through with the popworld baby?? CAN YOU IMAGINE

you can't be surprised that a guy who wears false teeth in the name of absurd comedy for a living enjoyed a film about a man who wears false teeth in the name of absurd comedy!

a friend of mine gifted me a while of nordvpn, so that's what i've been using lately, but it depends what you need a vpn for. for example, if you're torrenting and need to seed content (for ratios or whatever), you'll need something with port forwarding like airvpn. if you're just trying to find something to switch between countries' netflixes or abuse streaming services, surfshark is very popular but i'd say expressvpn comes more highly recommended. once you pick the vpn you'd like to use, it's easy to find tutorials on youtube!

aww you're too kind 🥹🫂

———

☆ FAQ ➜ PANEL SHOW WATCH LINKS • NON-PANEL SHOW WATCH LINKS ♥ https://ko-fi.com/panelshowsource

[pirateprincessblog]

𝐋𝐈𝐁𝐈𝐃𝐈𝐍𝐄

( 𝟎.𝟐 ) 𝐚 𝐰𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐞 𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐥𝐝.

!𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤 𝐢𝐬 𝐚 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬! 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐬 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞: 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 or here

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: park seonghwa x oc (alice dawson) x jung wooyoung 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 4.2k 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐬: dilf!hwa, collegestudent!wooyoung, love triangle, dilf trope, eventual smut, angst, fluff 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐬: yet to come

𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬: this series will be around 10-15 chapters :) please don't hesitate to leave feedback! thank you for reading <33

𝐃𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐦𝐞𝐫: 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐚 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤 𝐨𝐟 𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐍𝐎𝐓 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐧 𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐰𝐚𝐲.

"hey, i know you've been off the phone for a few days, and that you want some time alone. i just wanted to leave you a message so that you know that i am here for you."

"hey alice, it's been a week now. just thought i'd leave another voice message to remind you that i love you."

"rae says you haven't been coming to work. i'm getting worried now."

"why aren't you answering the door? are you okay?"

"you haven't spoken to your mother, either. i'm dying of worry. please at least view the messages i sent you so i know you're alive."

the redhead lies on her stomach, laptop opened on the bed in front of her. her eyes wander the articles on it, ignoring the burn from sleep deprivation and staring at the bright screen for a long time. her bladder is killing her, threatening to burst at any moment. but alice has been too lazy to get up for almost sixteen hours now, and her kidneys are pleading for mercy. she ignores it, clenching her core in hopes of relieving the pain. wooyoung's voice mails echo in the room, and she ignores that too. the knocking, ringing, calls, messages, all of it.

she opens the tab with her account balance again. the zeros on the screen are eating her inside out. the arrow on the screen clicks a different tab, and alice sighs, dropping her head on the pillow.

the famous onlyfans. it would be the easiest, fastest way. but is alice really at that point in her life? selling herself to strangers? well, pictures of herself. but still, to her, it was below her dignity. and she still had some. she thinks. what if they were only feet pictures? who cares about that? she would surely make a ton. enough to heal her mother, find a better place, and escape her pig of a father.

sugar daddy site? how does that even work? like onlyfans, but you only have one fan? and he is disgustingly older than you? what if he asks her for favours she cannot do?

a different job? she already has her dream job, and leaving it would be a disaster. the pay is god awful, but alice has never once spent her shift in a bad mood. always surrounded by the very thing she suffers from: fiction. fiction, daydreaming, imagination, you name it. alice suffers from it all. from the most wholesome and soft ones, to the evil erotic ones.

maybe the sugar daddy site will prove itself useful. they don't all have to be old and disgusting, right? after all, she can set boundaries. no live meeting, only texts, maybe a little role playing, and the money will flow. hopefully.

sugar daddy site

find exactly what you want discreetly, safely and fast. join the other 100 million members, experience love, luxury and sexual benefits.

click here to join now

it didn't take long for alice to click on the highlighted join button. she filled out the form with a fake name and address, but a correct town. after all, if he turns out to be someone actually gorgeous and not a complete creep, she wants to be within his range.

her friend requests are already flooding, along with message requests, and she has to take a moment collect herself. she doesn't have to answer any of them, she knows that. but some of those are extremely vulgar, filthy, and some straight up demanding. only two out of twenty messages are simple greetings, leading Alice to question her decision to join the site.

yourmaster75: hello gorgeous. nice tits. would love to play with them sometimes.

so muchfor a respectful hello. what a click bait. and what a cringe name. she clicks on the next one, hoping for a more appropriate approach.

sk1993: virgin or not?

alice is disgusted. she exits the site, then shuts her laptop. with her head buried in the bed, she reaches for her phone. it pains her to even unlock it, her brain having memorized the zeroes on the screen in the bank app. but she does it, feeling bad for poor wooyoung who was desperately trying to make sure she is alright. all while she was on a sex site.

my darling: i know you hate when i offer you money, but please, at least until you get some of it back, accept my help

my darling: or at least take a look at these job applications that i found

my darling: you don't even have to quit your current one, these are all two or three hours of work a day or just few times a week

alice sighs, feeling defeated. if only she had enough courage to face her father and demand her money back. instead, she is seriously considering getting a second job. perhaps it's for the best. it would serve as a distraction, keep her from thinking about her parents, and exhaust her enough to ensure a good night's sleep. the only downside would be not seeing wooyoung as much as before. but he understands, otherwise he wouldn't have sent her all those links or even offered his help.

my darling: now this one is just outside of town, but i could drive you there and you'd just get on the bus back. and the pay looks very good!

indeed, the pay looks very good. a month of working at this place is worth three of working at the library. and only a few hours a week?

babysitter needed

working hours: 17:00 - 22:00 (mon-wed-fri-sat) negotiable paycheck flexible working hours reimbursed transportation fees experience not required

requirements:

- non-smoker - sociable and extroverted - energetic and creative - proper attire and language usage

for any additional information, please call the number below to schedule an appointment.

it does not state the age of the child, which makes alice feel somewhat uneasy. if it's a toddler, she believes she could manage him. but a baby? an infant? how could she possibly know when it's hungry or thirsty? how would she know if it's in pain, and how would she help if it is? it all seems so daunting, and it discourages her from typing in the digits on her phone.

but the pay is tempting, and the young girl finds herself dialing the number swiftly, before she can change her mind. the voice on the other line is dull and snobby, it makes alice roll her eyes with each word that is said into her ear. she just can't wait to see where and with who she would work. after all, that amount of money and that voice do not belong to a regular family.

༺═━─━────༺༻────━─━═༻

the next few days are barely manageable. despite the annoying and obnoxiously loud device being locked away in the drawer, it still manages infuriate alice on the other end of the library. countless of calls and messages from her mother, and an unknown number. she doesn't have to guess twice who that number belongs to. but she could take a guess or two about the reason of the calls.

wooyoung, on the other hand, has given her space. he lets her know that he still loves her, leaving a good morning and good night message every day, along with a flower picked just by the sidewalk near the campus and sometimes a witty hand-written note. and alice sometimes replies, guilt eating her alive, and assures him that she loves him too. she assures herself too, pushing her feelings under the rug. she would never admit it, not even in her head, that she isn't sure in her love for him recently.

the relationship has been one-sided for a while now, with wooyoung doing everything. calls, texts, dates, everything. she was just there, fulfilling the role of the girlfriend. and she was happy while with him, really. but the moment she kissed him goodbye and shut the door, her heart gets drained of those feelings. she is scared to admit even to herself, still hoping that this is just a phase and that it will pass. maybe as soon as her mother recovers, or she fixes the damage her father has done.

yet deep down, she knows that she has cooled down. she doesn't feel the butterflies like she used to, she doesn't initiate anything in the relationship, and the only thing that is keeping her emotions somewhat alive are her books. wooyoung blames it on the situation, but alice knows she is the only one to blame. maybe it's those books, setting high standards that wooyoung can't fulfill. after all, what sane man would hold a knife to her throat as he pounds into her-

"hey, aren't you done for the day?" rae calls, causing alice to twitch and grab onto the ladder. "you were supposed to be out over half an hour ago."

"i was just unpacking the last of today's delivery. suddenly every professor, student and their mothers need this stupid book."

the curly haired girl gasps, putting a hand over her mouth dramatically. "did you, alice dawson, just call a book stupid?"

alice rolls her eyes at the other girl, hiding a smile and acting annoyed. she pushes the ladder aside, picking up the empty boxes and stomping on them to make them flat and easier to dispose.

"also, didn't you have somewhere to go today?"

"yeah, but that's at five in the afternoon."

"alice?"

"yes?"

"it's four fourty-five."

the stomping on boxes is replaced by stomping down the library, legs carrying the girl to the locker with her belongings faster than ever. her hands struggle to unlock it, items falling everywhere as she reaches for her open backpack. she collects anything she can, before storming outside with a quick goodbye to her confused and worried coworker.

the bus has departed long ago, and alice can either run there, or get a taxi. the zeroes on her screen are reducing, and alice is thankful for that. but it feels so painful to spend money now, even when it's needed. having no other choice, the girl jumps into the back seat, showing the driver the address and leaning against the window, hoping to make it on time.

her gaze lingers on the buildings as the car leaves the city behind. winter days approach, with the sun setting earlier than usual and the street lamps already coming to rescue before it completely disappears and darkness swallows the city. as the buildings slowly fade and start turning into grass and trees, her eyes decide to rest for a while.

in such a short time, she dreams of a better life. she dreams of a complete, functional family, a job that she loves but pays well, a healthy relationship with wooyoung again, a house that is not only a bedroom and a bathroom. not a mansion. just a simple house or flat, much like all people her age have.

when she opens her eyes, she sees a house she only ever saw on those luxury social media pages. dark grey stone, with vines decorating it and stopping just near the dark framed windows. large windows. alice steps out of the car, mesmerized by the view that never stops. the gates are open, allowing her to take a look at the path through the greenest grass she's ever seen. fountains, statues, fruit trees, and whatnot. alice has never been a fan of fruit, rather settling for a slice of pizza or chocolate. but her hazel eyes have never seen such deep crimson apples, shining under the last golden rays of sunshine. her mouth becomes watery, and her fingers yearn to touch.

is this what hungry eyes are? she would've never touched one in a grocery store, not even think of eating it. yet there she is, trailing behind the man who introduced himself to her at the entrance and looked at her somewhat disapprovingly, her gaze fixed on the trees.

"watch it, girl." the older man in the suit warns, putting a hand in front of her.

she halts, looking down. her feet are planted at the bottom of the stairs, and had the snobby man not intervened, she might have stumbled, gracing the beautiful cobblestones with a memorable kiss, likely leaving an imprint on her nose.

"you are about to enter the park residence, and it is my duty to remind you of some rules, miss..."

"dawson." she replies, raising an eyebrow. rules?

"lovely. miss dawson, refrain from using vulgar vocabulary, do not chew any gum, candy, whatever it is that is rustling in your pockets, and last, but not least, you are to not talk to mr park."

"and..." the girl's voice comes out raspy, and she takes a moment to clear her throat before continuing, "...why is that?"

"you are here to do business with mrs park. mr park doesn't like to be disturbed, he has a tight schedule and runs on seconds. any minor distraction, his day becomes unsucessful."

"sounds like a happy man."

the older man spares her a glance, before going up the stairs and opening the big doors. she is first greeted by a grand staircase, then hit with a pleasant smell of pastries.

"please wipe your shoes before entering, the maid has mopped the floor twice today already. if she sees a speck of mud again, she will get sent into cardiac arrest."

the redhead glances at her once white sneakers, now grey and dusty, nearly falling apart. one of the shoelaces is undone, but seeing the man already continuing the journey, she simply tucks it into her sneaker and wipes the soles on the mat. she catches up to him, her gaze sweeping the marble tiles reflecting the massive chandelier. it lights up the staircase, unveiling a red rug spilling down the wooden stairs and all the way to the entrance. alice didn't have a chance to stand on it yet, because the man led her through an alternate route. possibly because of the state of her shoes.

alice suddenly feels... cheap. the odd one out. an outcast. the more she looks at her surroundings, the worse she feels. she didn't know such lifestyle exists. used to tripping over clothes and books on the way to the fridge in her own flat, alice couldn't comprehend the vastness of the newly discovered space and everything that came with it. that's why her eyes settled for looking at the man's back, the tailcoat suddenly a very interesting shade of black.

she is lead to a kitchen, equally lavish. dark wooden cupboards, a whole kitchen island, and a cook.

"jude, could you seat the girl while i go get mrs park?"

"sure thing, franklin."

the aroma of pastries intensifies as the lady opens the oven, fogging up the kitchen briefly before revealing a batch of steaming hot cupcakes. also red in colour, with specks of white in it.

"apologies, dear. i'll be with you as soon as i pop in another batch."

as she busies herself with pouring the batter in the tins, alice decides to take a good look at her. she looks younger than franklin, the butler she assumes, but not young. her face is very mature, and her body language so graceful. clean, trimmed nails, dark haired with grey strands pulled in a tight bun, and minimal makeup on her eyes and cheeks. alice decides she likes this woman, unlike franklin.

"sit down, love. would you like tea? milk? anything?"

"do you happen to have coffee?" she carefully asks, trying to sound polite and not demanding.

"oh, sorry. mrs park hates the smell of it, in any way. coffee is absolutely forbidden in my kitchen, or in the manor."

"then, tea will do. thank you."

the woman, jude, opens her cupboards, reading the flavors she can offer. alice picks one closest to her hand, not wanting to inconvenience her. as she works on the beverage, alice sits at the kitchen island and gathers everything she has heard about the mysterious mrs park. mr park sounds horrible, and mrs park doesn't seem to be a ray of sunshine either. luckily, she would soon find out.

as she blows on the hot beverage, her eyes can't help but eye the pastries that are being aligned on a three tear porcelain plate with a golden rim. her ears don't pick up the distant clicking of shoes in the hallway, too busy listening to the sound of the cupcake wraps and jude's soft humming. it isn't until the clicking is right near alice that she jolts, setting the fancy looking cup on the small plate before her lips have touched the liquid.

"oh, great. a ginger. well, good evening. glad to see you enjoy a nice cup of tea after being late." the tone sounds sincere, but smile on the woman's face gives it away. it is bitter, almost yelling at alice to leave the place right away. "but, that's alright. you don't need to get defensive."

"uh- i was just-"

"you. don't. need. to. get. defensive. clear?" the woman claps her hands after each word, before pointing both of them at alice while still together.

"clear." the redhead says, mind still lingering on the ginger comment.

"good. now, before we begin, i- jude, what is this?"

jude puts the final cupcake on the plate, looking happy with her work. "red velvet cupcakes with white chocolate bits, ma'am. like your daughter asked."

"no, no way. how much sugar is in that?"

happiness drains from her face, replaced by furrowed eyebrows and stuttering. "i- i don't know. not much, ma'am. i promise."

"she's not having that. throw it away and make her an acai bowl or something. how dare you?"

alice's heart crumbles seeing the cupcakes being removed off the plate and shoved into a paper bag, only to be handed to franklin who exits the kitchen and makes his way outside with it.

"excuse me." jude bows her head, then follows franklin's path outside.

"right, alice. how old are you?"

the girl fidgets in her seat, anger flowing in her veins. the woman in front of her is so nonchalant, as if she didn't destroy someone's hard work with a few sentences. she is furious, her hands itching to smack the smile off the woman's face. she is disgustingly pretty, which pisses alice further off. blonde haired, with ice cold grey eyes, and clear tight skin. such a horrible person, with such a nice appearance. unfair.

"twenty two." she replies, trying to remain respectful, although she lost all her respect for her.

"perfect. my daughter turns twenty two soon, so that part is good. now..." she gets a tablet from one of the drawers on the kitchen island, sharp nails clicking against the screen.

"wait, what?"

"do not interrupt me." mrs park points a finger at alice, without lifting her eyes from the device in her hands. "now, would you say that you are active? creative? what do you do in your free time?"

"i read. when i have time."

mrs park frowns, pursing her lips. "anything else? anything that is not... boring to death?"

"reading is not boring." alice defends herself, and her dear books, resulting in mrs park whipping her head at her tone. "with all due respect, ma'am, reading is not boring. but, i guess aside from that... i used to paint and play sports."

"and why don't you do that anymore?"

"i work a lot."

"fair enough. do you enjoy shopping?"

"what kind of shopping? groceries?" alice genuinely asks, making the woman laugh.

"clothes, jewelry. you know, shopping. don't tell me you don't do that?"

"not quite, no." not since every single penny went to her mother's healthcare.

"luckily, it's addictive. you won't have any trouble getting used to that. now, my daughter loves shopping, and money isn't an issue. you'll get along very well."

"i'm sorry, i'm confused."

"well, if you would let me talk, i'd explain it to you. you're not here to babysit. not exactly. you're here to be my daughter's friend."

alice doesn't know if she heard well. she swears she read the article multiple times, and it spoke of babysitting.

"i do have a little son, milo, who will need looking after from time to time. but my priority is clara. she hasn't got a friend in the world, and she is growing really desperate. naturally, i put that article out to find a match for her."

if alice thought that she is pathetic, this just made her feel better. a mother paying someone to be friends with her daughter?

"now, everything fits perfectly, and i'm going to assume that you'll change your choice of clothes the next time you're here?"

looking down at her oversized hoodie and plain black leggings, alice bites the inside of her cheek. this woman's talent is putting other's down. perhaps it's the defiance, perhaps the pay, maybe even curiosity with such a lifestyle and how luxurious it gets, alice finds herself smiling at the woman and shaking her hand either way.

"i'll see you on monday. not late, preferably."

"yes, ma'am. looking forward to it."

"likewise, alice."

leaving the woman alone in the kitchen with a warm chair and a cold, untouched beverage, alice makes her way outside. franklin waits at the top of the stone stairs, speaking to jude. once they notice alice, they stop the conversation, and he takes it upon himself to approach her and offer to walk her out.

"see that car?" the man subtly motions towards the gates, hoping that alice would equally subtly look. but she fails to do so, glancing at the shiny black suv that is driving towards them. "don't look!"

alice jolts, returning her gaze on the butler.

"that's mr park. you are not to speak to him, only bow your head respectfully and stay like that until he enters the house. then, you can go."

"why such rules? is he a nobleman?" annoyance is evident in her voice, eyes rolling at the ridiculous behaviour.

"he is our boss, the man that provides us a roof over our heads and food for our stomachs. i realize basic politeness and ability to adapt to a more sophisticated environment are close to non-existent for you, but at least try to- good evening, sir."

franklin is forced to interrupt his scolding once the doors of the vehicle open, a tall figure stepping out of it. jude, franklin, and the driver all bow their heads. except alice. her gaze is stubbornly locked on the man, jaw almost on the floor.

a gorgeous man, who walks with such grace, and has impeccable fashion sense. a long black coat hangs from his shoulders only, revealing the full outfit underneath. he wears a loose black dress shirt, tucked into flawlessly ironed black slacks, and polished pointy shoes. his dark hair reaches to his collar, curtain bangs falling gently over his eyes, which are fixed on the phone in his hand. the driver gets into the car, going back the same way he came and parking the car in front of the gates.

"evening, franklin. jude." he greets, voice dripping honey.

alice slumps her shoulders as if trying to hide, feeling even more self conscious. she wasn't sure that was possible.

mr park must've noticed a new figure in line, one that doesn't quite fit in with the black and white dress code the manor seems to be following. he looks up from his phone, dark eyes looking into alice's. she could see the statue lights in them, making them as shiny as the silver rings on his slender fingers. he tilts his head slightly, not blinking.

"and who might this be?"

"the babysitter, sir. apologies, she was just on her way." franklin speaks for alice, and she is thankful for that. she isn't sure she can form her own sentence. not while the man looks at her so intensely.

"so joanne finally approved one?"

"yes, sir. she seems like a good fit."

"good." mr park nods, locking his phone and shoving it into his pocket. he approaches alice, face so close to her it makes her audibly gulp. "well then, welcome."

he holds his hand out for her to take. she hesitates, the proximity making her knees weak and legs ice cold. he smells of lilies and sandalwood, with a trace of vanilla, and it reduces her ability to function. franklin nudges her foot with his, jolting her awake. she accepts mr park's hand, feeling a wave of relief as a genuine smile spreads across his face. her hand fits perfectly in his, as comforting as a fuzzy warm hug on a bad day.

"get home safely, miss...?"

"dawson, sir. alice dawson."

"right, miss dawson. franklin, please escort miss dawson to my car and have gulliver drive her home."

"oh, that is not necessary-" alice tries to politely decline, but gets interrupted by franklin.

"right away, sir."

"have a good night, alice."

"good night, mr park."

the butler wishes his boss a good night, then escorts alice to the gates and near the car.

"on monday, i expect you to arrive on time. in proper clothes. no crop tops, no short skirts, no cleavage. polo shirts, shirts, long skirts, long dresses, that is allowed. don't make me send you home to change. and if possible, buy new shoes. ones that aren't falling apart with each step you take. understood?"

"understood."

"good. travel safely. good night, miss dawson."

"good night, franklin."

franklin turns around, making his way to the manor. the driver patiently waits in the car, not uttering a word to alice. before entering the vehicle, her eyes notice the familiar paper bag set on the floor next to the trash bin. even their trash bin is fancy, able to open only with a chip or a password. maybe so that people like alice wouldn't go through it and enjoy their discarded possessions.

without further thinking, alice grabs the bag, the batch of cupcakes still fresh and untouched in it before hopping into the car and saying her address to the driver.

[princess-of-the-corner]

Public Divorce AU

Mostly Random ideas/events that will not leave me be. Some I am 100% “Yes, this is how it would play out”, others it’s more “this is the vibe, but I’m not sure on exact events and actions”. As always, we run on suggestions and ‘yes and'ing each other!

- So, the Rogercop thing goes a little differently, cause both André and Audrey showed up for Parents’ Day to try and score some good publicity points, and. Uh. One thing leads to another, and André fires Roger for…well, he gives some legit reason, but the ACTUAL one is that he thought Roger was “taking Audrey’s side”. He wasn’t, for the record. He was actually standing up for both Chloé and Sabrina, and was just trying to get the Bourgeois to maybe calm down. They did not, and Roger ends up fired. Shortly after, Roger starts working at the Museum as a security guard, which it turns out he’s actually pretty good at.

- Most Chloé related Akuma go differently. Instead of going after Chloé, most are going after André or Audrey, cause they showed up and did something stupid. Chloé’s still at root cause for a few, but not nearly so many.

- Chloé does end up meeting Zoé. Zoé and her dad get dragged to Paris by Audrey as part of the “divorce proceedings�� (she’s really rubbing them in André’s face). Both are extremely apologetic to Chloé, who’s just “trust me, this is NOT your fault”. They end up sticking around Paris (everyone is confused on WHY) and Zoé starts attending school with the Miracuclass.

- Still stuck on Lila being baffled by how “low maintenance” the class is, when in actuality, it’s more effort, it’s just stuff she enjoys, so it FEELS like less effort. She’s kind of suspicious and waiting for the moment she’ll have to lie to keep these “friends” but it never comes.

- the incident that majorly contributed to Chloé’s current “Don’t Give A Fuck” attitude, was André, in an effort to prove how bad of a parent Audrey is, posting a video of a slightly younger Chloé having a breakdown over something Audrey had done (unsure of what). Like, it was a moment captured by an opportunistic reporter, and at the time, André went to great lengths to ensure that clip NEVER saw the light of day. He basically bought the rights to the footage, meaning if anyone else aired it without his permission, André would be within his rights to sue the hell out of them. Then, when he needs ammo for his dick-measuring contest with Audrey, he uses that clip to prove how awful of a parent she is, proving himself to be just as bad, because he just showed a very vulnerable moment of Chloé’s without her permission. When Chloé tries to confront him about it, André dismisses her concerns, and just points out it’s Audrey’s fault for upsetting Chloé in the first place. 

- André and Audrey start dipping into illegal activity to try and get back at each other.

- when André starts bringing home his new girlfriends, that’s when Chloé unofficially moves out of the Hotel. She does NOT want to be around for this. While she still technically lives at the hotel, and will occasionally spend the night if André had her show up at an event or something, she is otherwise packing up all her stuff and moving into the Agreste Mansion. (It took almost a week for Gabe to realize she’d taken over the guest room closest to Adrien’s.)

- the Style Queen Trilogy goes differently. Or rather, it goes mostly the same, right up until Style Queen is pointing her glitter ray at Adrien. At that point, it gets derailed, by Chloé bodily launching herself at Style Queen and grappling with her, shouting for Adrien to run. Adrien does indeed book it (if he changes into Chat fast enough-), but Chloé gets hit with a glancing blow. And rather than immediately changing into a statue, Chloé starts slowly turning to glitter, starting from where the ray hit, but she’s still conscious and mobile. So she keeps going. Keeps trying to fight Audrey, keeps trying to rip the item off. She kicks, bites, and claws at Audrey, snarling and shouting the whole time. Eventually, she’s too disintegrated to hold on, and Audrey throws her off, resulting in Chloé dissipating into a cloud of glitter upon hitting the ground, vanishing. Ladybug and Chat Noir beat Style Queen, and Miraculous Cure everyone back, but this is the incident that gets Fu to give Chloé the Bee. It’s also the incident that makes Gabe start running all his power ideas for André and Audrey by Nathalie.

- For almost a week after this, Adrien and Sabrina are both extremely clingy. So are most of their friends. Chloé’s actually pretty ok (it didn’t hurt, felt more like going numb, and she was so enraged she barely noticed) but everyone else has ✨trauma✨.

- Infinity War is now banned media for their class.

- Chloé tries to do a “I don’t feel so good, Mister Stark”, sends half her class into a panic attack. 

- the Incident that finally gets both Audrey and André “taken out” so to speak, is near the end of the divorce. Because everything is more or less settled, except for one thing. Who gets custody of Chloé. This is complicated (for them) by Chloé being old enough to have input, which is “I’d rather live in a sewer than with either of them”. The way they decide to handle this is by each trying a big spectacle to prove THEY are the better parent, and said spectacle ends up with Chloé (and possibly others) becoming endangered. Not by an Akuma either, this is just plain mortal stupidity. Also, probably illegal, whatever it is, resulting in both André and Audrey being arrested, and Chloé ends up under someone else’s Guardianship (Gabe? Someone else?). The thing that sprung to mind was they each separately hire some goons to kidnap Chloé, so that they can come in and “save” her, proving that THEY are the superior parent, but they accidentally do it on the same day, so instead they had a mutual shoot out or something.

- because Chloé’s parents get arrested, Chloé gains control over BOTH their financial assets. She promptly begins to sell off EVERYTHING SHE CAN. Some personal effects, she can’t touch, but what she can, she is selling. The hotel? Sold. Style Queen Magazine? Gone. Yachts, cars, jets, stocks - all sold to the highest bidder. Everything they fought over during the divorce, she sells as soon as she can.

Thoughts? Opinions? Comments?

-

Ohohoho!

- Au where Roger is decent hell yeah!

- absolute rip to them getting involved but YEAH that’d cause Akumas

- they end up sticking around because Mr. Lee is like ‘well someone has to look out for this kid’s wellbeing’

- Lila is both happy and filled with anxiety.

- OH OUCH. Yeah that’d- that’d really break all love and trust huh? It’s one of those things that Chloé would’ve used to think that Andre scrubbed the video from existence because he cared, but now it’s just so clear that it was only to save his own reputation/image and it taints everything.

- these damn rich people

- I just imagine Gabriel actually showing up to breakfast with Adrien for once only for Chloé to waltz in still half-asleep in pajamas and messed up hair and just steal Adrien’s toast and Gabe is like ????

- Oh this HURTS

- Yeah everyone’s traumatized

- OH SHE WOULD LMAO

- Honestly yeah them doing some ridiculous shit that can’t be handwaved as Hawkmoth’s fault because hey no Akumas this time just them? And that’s the tipping point because sure before this was clearly an unhealthy environment for Chloé but it was never anything that could get them in legal trouble it just made everyone judge them. But now? This is Al Capone’s taxes. Also yeah the incident being them both staging danger to ‘save’ Chloé and prove themselves the ‘better parent’ makes sense.

- selling everything they fought over is the ultimate power move

[ehlnofay]

on the one hand I appear to be having an abrupt mental downswing for no apparent reason and I can expect the next [indeterminate length of time] to be significantly more difficult than it needs to be. on the other hand I'm in the middle of writing a fucked up little story and this will help me with Hopeless Miserable Atmosphere and scene referencing! glass half full kind of outlook

[august--and-everything-after]

I bought myself some CDs :3

[exopelagic]

WHY DID NOBODY TELL ME BURROWS END WASNT FREE

[scorpiusmalfoylovesoscarwilde]

I made a meme do you leik it :)

[tardis--dreams]

Me panicking because i have 9 missed calls and 5 emails talking about my absence and how "a colleague could take over for me" vs. Me knowing it's really not that important no matter how pushy a client is and that on top of it I'm underpaid and have way to much overtime so i shouldn't even care

[livelaughlovekill]

panic

[insanechayne]

~ ~ ~

[ace-up-your-sleeve]

father pretending to care abt me being successful againnnn brother stfuuuu im trying to drop you off at the airport 😭

[thebuttsmcgee]

so. um. 👉👈

hi guysies.

Ig I should just say like. Hi

I haven't been posting here as much cause. Idk. Might be depression? I keep thinking its cause I've been so busy, which also wouldn't be not untrue, but these past, like, 3 weeks I think so far? I've had some free time but I haven't cause. I dunno, then again, I haven't been doing too much in general? I gues, besides very mandatory things, hell I've even been lacking in my regular skyrim hours of playing.

That, and as said, I get super melancholic when I remember just how sad and bittersweet it is that t0h is. Actually legit over. The show and experience, that is.

Oh all that and also becuz my headphones broke! Fuck! That's like number 2 in my bare necessities for when I post, do almost anything really! It's seriously been painful this past month going without headphones holy shit. Dude I've been scratching at the bit for some relief for headphones, I NEED music legitimately. Even right now, as I'm typing this on my phone, my music is on low levels.

But yerp. Its been. Rough. Really rough. I really do appreciate yall, everyone of yall. Have a sweet week everyone, ✌️!

[luckyladylily]

You know, after a hundred days of strike, I have noticed absolutely no differences.

I mean, they say shows are canceled because of it, but they would cancel shows for any reason or no reason at all. They often wouldn't tell us one way or another for months or years. Functionally, the uncertainty is the same.

The same goes for delays. How the hell am I supposed to tell if some show or another was delayed? They were never released in any sort of timely fashion before. What does a delay even mean when there is nothing even resembling a schedule? I mean, there wasn't even something like "within the first two weeks of august we will put something up for you to watch."

Zero accountability means they got away with whatever bullshit practices they wanted to, but now its cutting both ways. Any claim that this strike is negatively impacting me is meaningless because Netflix and most the other entities like them have built a system where it is extremely difficult to hold anyone accountable for anything.

And now they seem to think they can just bring accountability back? If they had numbers they could point to maybe it would work, but that's half the battle here. They are desperate to avoid releasing anything that tells anyone outside the company what the hell is going on. So we are just supposed to take their word for it, no really bro, it's actually really bad for you and all the strikers fault if only you could see the numbers that we refuse to show you, you're just gonna have to trust us bro.

[rafey-baby]

clumsy!reader is still bad at yoga and yoga instructor!rafe wants to keep her all to himself...

c/w: rafe being touchy & blatantly flirting w her, him getting jealous, slightly suggestive, reader being oblivious, 18+ mdni!

wc: 1.9k

idk if anyone missed him but he's back & better than ever !! (after a small vacation that ended up being almost 3 months :D)

some parts are more or less inspired by this, this, this & this ask

part 1

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Rafe is in the midst of helping someone fix their posture when he hears the gates of heaven opening in the form of a melodious giggle chiming from the back of the room. He lifts his head in order to detect the source of such a vibrant sound; noticing that his favorite client is currently directing her attention towards some guy next to her.  

The joyful expression she’s sporting makes a scowl paint over his features. Why is this random man making her laugh like that?  

“Yeah, you got it. Just keep workin’ on it though,” he quickly dismisses the person he was helping before stomping over to find her practically lying on the floor with the guy’s hands on her calf, along with his mat pulled far too close to hers for Rafe’s liking.   

“I think you should bend it more here, right? I’m honestly not too sure,” the guy chuckles as he tries to figure out what she’s doing wrong.  

“No cause I have no idea how everyone else makes it seem so easy. It’s so hard to get it right, I feel so stupid half the time,” she complains with a huff, not even noticing Rafe looming within earshot.  

“Seriously, I thought this was a beginner’s class but it feels like some of these poses are meant for like literal pros,” he continues with a shake of his head. 

“I know, right?” another peal of laughter bubbles from her throat as she shifts into a seated position, giving up altogether.  

“Everything alright?” Rafe doesn’t mean for his tone to come out so clipped but there’s something in the way the guy’s touching her so freely that makes his hands curl into fists. 

He keeps reminding himself over and over again that this is a client, which means that he can’t just smash his face in— no matter how severely his fingers are itching for it right about now.  

“Oh, I was just trying to help her with this,” the guy explains in tandem with her head turning to look at Rafe. She seems startled.  

“Well, why don’t you focus on your own form for a change? I mean, s’kinda my job to help her, yeah?” he scoffs, making the guy halt his movements in a state of surprise before he's lifting his hands up in apology.  

“Damn, sorry dude,” he mutters out from under his breath while Rafe merely glares at him with the words stay professional bouncing around his skull.  

A tense silence follows, making her grow quiet while she takes slow sips from her water bottle as a distraction; wondering why he seems so bothered to see her talking to someone else.  

However, when he finally turns his attention towards her, she shrugs it off as him merely having a bad day because it seems like the only logical explanation to her. Because at the end of the day, him being jealous makes as much sense to her as her math homework in high school.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Rafe is convinced that the universe is purposefully trying to poke and prod at his limits, giving his carefully curated facade opportunities to crack— allowing for the borderline psychotic aspects of his personality to breathe through the crevices. Because only a week later, Rafe sees her entering the gym with another guy she seems to be awfully friendly with. 

“That’s crazy, I don’t even wanna know what Kie said to that,” she rolls her eyes jokingly while he’s showing her something on his phone.  

”Yeeeah, guess you could say she wasn’t the biggest fan,” he laughs in a carefree manner, raking a hand through his disheveled, sand-colored hair.  

“For some reason I’m not surprised,” she mutters out before she notices Rafe standing in the hallway leading to the yoga class. “Oh, gotta go so I’m not late. See you after?” 

“Yeah, I’ll be here. Think Pope said he’s gonna join me for leg day, so we’ll see if I’m still standing when you get back. But you have fun,” he offers her a wave before walking away towards the locker rooms. 

And at last, her warm eyes meet Rafe’s. “Hi,” her voice is soft, nearly shy; a stark contrast to her demeanor only a few seconds ago.  

“Hey,” he greets her in a casual manner, although his mind is somewhere else entirely. “So, that your boyfriend or?” he tries to approach the subject with nonchalance because it’s not necessarily any of his business.  

He’s not even sure why he’s asking— keeps telling himself that he’s just curious and tries to appear friendly by making small talk. After all, some clients have given him feedback on his apparently intimidating aura, claiming they don’t always have the courage to ask for his help because they get anxious he’ll judge them. Therefore, it's something he’s been trying to work on.  

“What? Oh, JJ? No, he’s just a friend. He goes to the gym here, so I usually just tag along with him. Free ride, right?” she answers with a lighthearted tone.  

“Right. Yeah,” he scratches at the back of his neck, contemplating whether or not to ask the next question since he doesn’t want to overstep any boundaries. However, there’s something deep in his stomach that grumbles at the prospect of her being in a relationship, makes him feel nearly insane and ultimately, makes the decision for him. 

“You, uh, you got one?”  

“What?” she asks, features coated in confusion. 

“A boyfriend, I mean,” his gaze is unwavering, eager.  

“Oh, um— no, I don’t. Why?” her puzzled eyes flit over the lines of his countenance, seemingly trying to grasp onto his motives. 

“Just, uh…wondering. I mean, he’d be kind of a dick if he’s not drivin’ you here himself,” he shrugs, a strange sort of relief making his shoulders feather-light when she lets out an airy giggle in response.  

“Yeah, honestly sometimes wish I had one just so he could drive me around and stuff,” she jokes while they begin to pad over to the class. 

“You don’t have your license yet?” he raises his brows in surprise.  

“No, I do. I just don’t really like driving. I don’t know why but it’s so stressful to me. Usually try to avoid it as much as I can,” she elaborates while gathering her hair away from her face and securing the strands into a ponytail.   

“Oh yeah? Well, if you ever need a ride home just let me know, alright?” he says, fighting the urge to tuck a loose tendril that has managed to escape the restraints of her hair tie back behind her ear.  

“Really? That’s so sweet of you! But, um, wouldn’t wanna be a bother,” the hesitation is present in her voice.  

“Nah, couldn’t bother me if you tried,” he promises, wishing they could talk for longer. However, the ocean of people flooding inside the room behind them cuts their conversation short.  

“You’re just saying that,” she dismisses him with a playful scoff. 

“M’being for real. You’re my favorite face around here. Plus, makes my job more fun when you’re always stumblin' on your feet,” he can’t help his mouth from twisting upwards at the way her eyes round out in response to his words. 

“Shut up. I’m gonna go set down my mat now, before there’s only space right in front of you,” she offers him a giddy smile that makes him grin like an idiot. Then, she’s tiptoeing away from him in order to locate a vacant spot. 

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

Rafe has become awfully familiar with these newfound feelings of fondness for the girl who’s by far the most helpless little bambi he’s ever encountered. He thinks she should honestly pick another hobby at this point, because maybe yoga just isn’t meant for her. However, he’d never say any of that out loud because even the thought of not seeing her getting all flustered while she loses her balance whenever he’s near makes him feel physically unwell.  

He’s not entirely sure whether her apparently oblivious brain simply hasn’t caught onto the fact that he so clearly has a thing for her, or if she’s well aware and merely chooses to be a tease about it. Nonetheless, the moment she walked into the class today, he could feel his workout shorts tightening and all she’d offered him was a simple smile.  

And now she’s right in front of him, all tangled limbs and pretty eyes blinking up at him— practically begging for his guidance and for him to put his hands all over her (something she doesn’t seem to mind all that much).  

“You put this cute little set on just for me, huh?” he rasps out while his thumb smooths over the bubblegum pink fabric; feeling it out as he pinches the stretchy fabric between his fingertips, making her breath get caught in her throat in the process.  

“Oh, um— just wanted to…try out some new stuff I ordered. You think it’s cute?” she stares at him with something bashful glimmering in her eyes. 

“Mhm. Fits you nice,” he mumbles out as his gaze lingers on the way the tight material wraps around her figure, not leaving much to the (his) imagination. He bets it’d be so easy to just rip right through these cute yoga pants and pull her closer with a firm grip on her hips before burying his face between her plush thighs.

“Thanks,” she peeps out, flustered.  

He tries to shake off the improper, filthy thoughts with a clear of his throat when he gets caught staring at her for a little too long.  

“So, you actually wanna bend your leg on the other side of your body on the mat and support your foot with your left arm not the right one. Easy to get them confused,” he chuckles as she shifts her position according to his instructions as best as she can. 

“Like this?” she seeks reassurance with a soft tone.  

“Yeah, just like that, Bambi. Good job,” his mouth quirks up some while her mind begins to cloud over in response to his low cadence. She’s not entirely sure what exactly it is about him that makes her feel so fuzzy on the inside, but she thinks it’s nice, thinks she wants to always have him this close to her— wants him even closer.

She doesn’t remember the last time she’s had such an intense crush on someone— slowly turning into a crazy person by each second of not knowing whether he’s merely flirting with her for his own amusement or because he’s actually into her. However, she thinks she’s embarrassed herself in front of him far too many times for the latter to be true in any reality.  

“Then need you to move your right hand here,” he adjusts her form with a grip on her wrist while he maneuvers her to his liking; tingles erupting all over the skin he skims over with his fingertips.  

Her head is spinning.  

“See? Knew you could do it. Feels nice, hm?” he rumbles out, letting his hands rest on her shoulders for support, despite the position not really requiring it.  

She hums her response because she doesn’t trust for any coherent words to stumble out of her mouth at the moment, all the while Rafe is desperately trying to not pay attention to the nearly painful situation in his pants.

[simpforboys]

Surprise! (3)

Drew Starkey x fem!singer!reader

Summary: reader and Drew celebrate the release of the ‘Perfume’ music video!

Warnings: fluff, smut, oral (f receiving), praise, swearing, male masturbation, dirty talk, missionary position, sex on couch, daddy kink, protective piv sex, boob worship (?), drinking wine, fangirling

Part one, part two, part four

taglist is full :(

Two weeks had went by.

Two long, busy weeks of you not hearing much from Drew, other than the promotions and photo stills you would send him.

It was finally the release day, and within 18 hours, the video had already reached 200 million views.

You were currently sitting on your light grey couch, flicking through Netflix movies when your phone buzzed with a notification.

Drew Starkey: Hey, congrats on the success of the video. I’m still very honored you wanted me to he apart of it. You still down to celebrate?

Oh.

In all honesty you were expecting Drew to stop talking to you after the shoot.

But within those two weeks, you were both extremely busy, so reaching out was hard.

That didn’t mean you two didn’t text at all, it was just two or three messages a day.

Drew was notorious for being a bad texter, not to mention how filled up his schedule was.

So you never took it to heart. Or, at least tried.

But seeing the notification that he actually still wanted to hang out, wanted to celebrate with you…

Your User: hi, thank you so much! i’m still so happy and grateful you said yes <33

Your User: and yes i’m still down to celebrate!! when are you free?

Maybe the double texting was too much, but you were already a glass of wine in, and texting your celebrity crush.

To your surprise, he replied pretty quickly.

Drew Starkey: I’m actually free rn surprisingly, are you?

Oh.

You were in fact free, but ready was the better question.

No, you were not ready to see Drew fucking Starkey, especially looking like how you were currently dressed.

Only wearing sweatpants, a shirt that is three sizes too big, fuzzy socks, and no bra was not exactly presentable to meet the love of your life.

Your User: yes, but i look absolutely horrible rn

Again, another quick response.

Drew Starkey: I doubt that. Can I come see you?

You typed out a message.

Your User: CNEOSHWOSHEODNEOWHSOWBSIFBEOSBAJDBDKDHOSBSKSBDJSHS😜✊👍😜🤭🔥🫶😩

That was what you really wanted to reply with, but instead went for something more nonchalant.

Your User: yeah, you want my address?

It was never good to share your address to anyone online, especially after only meeting in person twice.

But it was Drew Starkey. You would send anything to that man, no questions asked.

Drew Starkey: Yes please

You had spent the last 30 minutes frantically cleaning your apartment. Not that it was a complete mess, but you did want it to be cleaner than what it was.

A soft knock on your door was heard, heart pounding in your chest, hands shaking with nervousness.

Peeking through the peephole, seeing his familiar face was enough to make you almost back out.

Why did you have to be so fucking nervous? He was just a man.

Your fingers unlocked the door, opening it gently.

“Hey, Y/n.” Drew smiled warmly at you, holding a bouquet of flowers.

“Hi… come on in.” You grinned back, trying to hide the feeling in your chest.

Drew’s long legs guide him inside the apartment and he takes a second to look around.

It was cozy, and definitely you.

“I got these f’you.” He hums, holding out the flowers.

“Oh, these are my favorite flowers, Drew… you didn’t have to do that.” You awed, taking the bouquet as he practically handed it to you.

He knew they were your favorite flowers. He might have looked up y/n l/n’s favorite flower onto Google. Not that he would ever admit that, though.

“Really? Damn, lucky pick, I guess.” He chuckled, scratching the side of his neck a little sheepishly.

Putting the flowers in a vase, you realized that he was wearing sweats and a hoodie. It was 10:23pm on a Friday, and clearly you two were appreciating a night off.

It made you feel better about your outfit.

“Do you want anything to eat or drink? I have white or red wine, beer, vodka, soda, water…” You trailed off your options.

“What’re you drinking?” He hummed.

You nodded over to the coffee table, an open bottle of wine with a half filled glass on it.

“Wine.”

“I’ll just have some of that, then.” Drew murmurs.

You grabbed another wine glass and walked over to the couch, hearing his feet behind you.

Sitting down on the couch, you got all comfortable underneath the blanket again, then reached over to pour him a glass of wine.

“Cheers, to the success of ‘Perfume’, and to you.” Drew says softly, holding his glass out for you to clink.

Feeling your face grow a bit warm, you tapped your glass with his.

“Cheers to you being amazing.” You took a sip of the wine, your eyes locked onto his blue ones.

“You have a nice apartment, by the way. Forgot to say that.” He hums.

“Thank you, I wanted to make it as cozy as possible for those rare times I am at home.” You explain.

"Yeah, I get that. Life nowadays is just so hectic." He agrees, blue eyes trailing over your face, as if committing each feature to memory.

"Well, yeah. You're all big and famous now," you tease.

He chuckles sheepishly, his large hand running along the back of his head.

"You have any big plans coming up?" He asked you.

"Yeah, actually. I'm supposed to be preforming at the iHeartRadio Jingle Ball festival in a week," you nod.

"Really? Damn. That beats me, then." He joked.

"What do you have coming up?" You questioned.

"Variety is going to have Harris Dickinson and I do that Actors on Actors interview thing."

"Yeah? That sounds fun," you hummed.

The two of you spent an hour and a half talking about life, success, and just got to know each other.

You both finished the bottle of wine and were now onto your second bottle, the two of you tipsy as you giggled on the couch.

Your body felt warm and you weren't completely sure if it was from the alcohol or the fact that a beautiful man was sitting a foot away from you on your own couch.

Drew felt the same, and one specific joke you made had him laughing a little too hard. His eyes creased in the corner as he smiled, those pretty dimples on display.

But when his large hand went to rest on your knee, the wine in your system completely fought off your anxiety, making you more relaxed.

You found yourself leaning into his touch, your hand resting atop of his.

"Your laugh is so cute, Drew," you murmured.

"Yeah? You're cute," he responded.

You bit your lip, eyes locked onto his. "Is that the alcohol talking or you?"

He grinned, shaking his head.

"That's me talking."

Oh.

"You're sweet..." you trailed off, trying to ignore how butterflies filled your belly.

He just hummed, a comfortable, tension-filled silence falling between you two.

"So, you really had a crush on me for four years?" He teased, squeezing your knee a little.

"Oh, god. We're back at this now, huh?" You grumbled in embarrassment, although there was no real malice behind your tone.

He smirked, licking his lips. "We never left it."

"I certainly did."

"Yeah? You don't have a crush on me anymore?" He murmured, the playful tone in his voice making your stomach turn more.

"I didn't say that...." you trailed off, picking at the extra skin near your nails.

His eyes trail over your form again, taking in every inch of you he can see that's not hidden by the blanket on your lap.

"Hm? Sorry, I didn't hear you."

You rolled your eyes, face hot. "I'm sure you didn't."

He laughed, scooting a little closer to you so your legs were touching.

"'m just fucking with you," he said softly.

"I know..." you glanced over at him, eyes instinctively falling down to his pretty lips.

It had been too long since you felt them on you.

Maybe it was the wine, maybe it was the boost of confidence Drew had gotten, but he slowly leaned in, his free hand going to run his index finger and thumb on your chin.

"Is this okay?" He asked quietly.

"Yeah... yes..." you breathed out shakily, heart racing.

He hummed, gently connecting your lips to his own.

Feeling that familiar, addictive spark when his skin touched yours. You immediately kissed back, your left hand going to cup his jaw.

Kissing. You were kissing Drew fucking Starkey. And it wasn't for work, wasn't for cameras. He kissed you first.

Within moments, he was laying you back on the light grey couch, the fluffy blanket being left abandoned on the floor.

His tongue was in your mouth, sculpted body hovering over yours. Your thighs were spread for him to nestle in between, left hand still cupping his strong jaw, right hand in that soft brown hair.

On instinct you pulled a little on the strands, making him grunt into your mouth. He disconnected your lips, trailing sloppy, needy kisses down your jaw and neck.

Chests pressed together, it was as if you two couldn't get any closer.

"Mhmm... Drew..." you whimpered softly when he nipped at the skin of your pulse point.

"Yeah? That feel nice, sweet girl?" He murmured, voice muffled from his attention on your neck.

You nodded, legs squeezing him in between your body.

"Can I take your shirt off, baby?" He asked, not wanting to do anything you weren't desiring.

"Please.." you breathed out, heart racing, stomach flipping.

His large hand slipped the oversized fabric off and over your head, a small whine leaving him when he saw your pretty tits.

"Fuck, Y/n... you been hiding these from me?" He mumbled teasingly, continuing his line of kisses and nibbles down your collarbone, in between the valley of your breasts.

"All you needed to do was ask," you panted. Your back instinctively arched up, your chest needing some attention from his warm mouth.

He groaned at your answer, moving slightly down your body until he was eye level with your hard nipples. He swirled his tongue around the bud, blue eyes locked on your face when he sucked your nipple into his mouth.

Your body jolted a little, making him hold your side with his left hand, his right hand massaging the other stiffened bud.

He switched sides after a few moments, relishing in the sounds of your pretty moans and pants.

But something else was throbbing and aching, desperately needing his attention.

"Drew," you whined.

"Hmm?" He hummed, still worshipping your boobs.

"Need you."

"Yeah?" He cooed, reluctantly disconnecting his mouth from your right nipple as he continued to kiss down your stomach.

You nod, breathing short and needy. He got to the waistband of your sweatpants, looking back up at you.

"You can take those off too." You gave permission, already knowing what the man was going to ask.

He wasted no time in slipping the fabric down your legs, readjusting so his face was in between your spread thighs.

"Look how you ruined these panties, pretty girl... you're so needy f'me, huh?" He murmured softly.

All you could do was whine when he pressed a tender kiss to your clothed clit, the fabric absolutely soaked. It had been way too long since you'd had sex.

His large hand slid the fabric down your thighs, leaving you completely bare for him.

"So beautiful, baby. So beautiful..." he muttered, talking more to himself than you.

Your legs twitched when he flicked his tongue against your clit, hands digging in his hair.

"Drew--"

"I know, baby. Let daddy eat this pretty pussy, yeah? Just sit back and relax."

A needy whimper left your mouth, but you didn't respond. Not that you could, as he licked a stripe from your pulsating hole to the top of your clit.

He hoisted your thighs over his broad shoulders, moaning a little at your taste. His movements became more eager, beginning to lap at your cunt like a starved man.

Right hand in his hair, left hand gripping the couch. Your eyes rolled back, hips bucking up towards his face.

He made a grunt directly into your clit, another jolt of pleasure going into your body.

"Daddy... fuck..."

His piercing blue eyes were feeding off of your facial expressions, his cock throbbing in his own sweats.

He slipped two fingers into your cunt, focusing his mouth on your clit. His left hand slid down his own pants, beginning to palm his cock through his boxers.

"Yeah? Is daddy making you feel good, sweet girl?" He coos, whining a little as his own hips buck on the couch, desperate for more friction.

His noise and hips bucking made your cunt clench around his fingers, as if trying to pull him in deeper.

The knot in your stomach was already forming, almost embarrassing how quickly he turned you into a mess.

Legs trembling over his shoulders, hips rocking against his face and chin. You couldn't even announce you were coming, mind fuzzy from the pleasure.

He hummed when he noticed you releasing, continuing to lap up all your juices as he came in his pants.

When your body calmed down, he pulled away from your pussy and kneeled in between your legs.

He peeled his own hoodie off, revealing that perfect, toned body of his again. Your eyes drank in the sight, licking your lips.

“You’re so hot, Drew…” you murmured.

His ears were ringing, need coursing through his veins as he slipped off his sweats and boxers.

You had to physically hold back a gasp when you saw his cock for the first time.

People had always written it differently in all those guilty pleasure Rafe Cameron fanfics you would read when you couldn’t sleep.

But seeing it in person was just a whole new experience.

It was long and thick, which was to be expected. The man radiated big dick energy.

Pretty mushroom tip that was still leaking, his pubic hair slightly fuzzy as if he hadn’t shaved it in a week.

“Holy shit…”

“Mhm? Better than you imagined?” He asked teasingly, a smirk on his face as he grabbed a condom from his wallet.

You couldn’t help but playfully roll your eyes, a small snicker leaving you.

He rolled the condom onto his shaft, moving to hover over you again.

“Are you sure you want this, Y/n?” He asked softly, eyes gazing intently into yours.

“Yes… please fuck me, daddy.”

He let out a small groan, nestling himself in between your thighs. He used a long, strong arm to grab a couch pillow and tuck it under your hips.

You watched as he teasingly slid his head up and down your slit, tapping it against your throbbing bundle of nerves.

“Don’t tease me, please,” you beg.

Your pretty begging weakened his resolve as he slowly slid into you.

Whimpers and noises of pleasure left the both of you at the feeling, a course of energy being shared within your two bodies.

He kept pushing until he was all the way inside, giving you a moment to adjust as he captured your lips in his.

Your hands roamed over his biceps and back, loving the way the muscles flex against your palms. His skin was burning, adding to the electric feel.

When he felt you stop tensing around him, he began to slowly pull back, before pushing in, creating a delicious rhythm.

“Fuck… you feel so fuckin’ good, baby.” He moaned.

Your legs tightened around his hips, a noise leaving you as he rubbed right against that spongy spot.

“So deep, Drew… can feel you so deep,” you whined in between breaths.

“Yeah? You take this dick so good, pretty girl.”

His movements were getting a little rougher with every minute passing, both of you needing this.

Your crush on him for four years, the sexual tension you shared in the music video, the chemistry when you first met him on The Tonight Show.

It was all so surreal and felt like you were living straight out of a fanfic or dream.

His head dropped down to your chest, clearly having a thing for your hardened nipples as he nibbled gently.

Maybe one day Drew would fuck you without the condom and be able to feel your warm, velvety walls squeezing him without the protection.

He could dream.

“Shit, shit, shit.” You swore, the pillow under your hips allowing for his tip to kiss your cervix with every thrust.

“Mhm, yeah. Good girl.” He praised breathlessly, feeling a little lightheaded from everything.

The couch creaked a little beneath you two, your nails digging into his back.

He was already close, eyes fluttered shut as he lifted his head to press a kiss to your forehead.

His calloused thumb went to rub your clit, making your legs twitch around his sculpted hips.

Your cunt squeezed around his cock, your belly on fire with your building orgasm.

“You gonna cum f’me, sweet girl?” He choked out, hips snapping against yours.

“Y-yes!” You squeak, mind hazy, body trembling.

“Yeah… that’s it… let me feel you…”

His breathy words, deep penetration, and touch on your clit sent you over the edge again.

You moaned loudly, clinging onto his body as he talked you through your orgasm.

He was also talking himself through it, feeling his cock twitch as he spilled his seed into the condom.

His body was still against yours, both of you catching your breaths from the intensity.

He pressed a chaste kiss to your forehead again, his chest rising and falling.

“You okay?” He asked you softly.

“Mhm… ‘m good…”

You kissed his lips again, more gently this time. His nose brushed against yours when he pulled away, lips connecting to your cheek.

He reluctantly slid out of you, kneeling between your legs again as his blue eyes gazed down at your cunt.

“Did you bring any more condoms?” You ask after a few moments.

He looks at your face, then reaches over to grab his wallet. He pulls out two more condom wrappers.

You grinned, licking your lips.

“So are we going two more rounds or what?”

tags!!

@slut4you @sweetlike-sugarplum @snowtargaryen @fastlovela @christinechickiee @ahgrace6 @evermorx89 @loren8818181 @eddiemuns0nl0ver @sophiesmovingcastle5 @chimchimjiminie16 @amel1ee @reader1402 @tqd4455 @rxeae @caraxes-syrax @shrimpybbq @drewstarkeysbabe @rafeswhoooreee @meropeeonmee @rafeluvrr @marvelahsobx @raeven-marie43 @fallout-girl219 @brendazzlingg @10ava01 @secretsideofbree @drewstarrrkey @p0gue420 @gibson-g1rl @kiiyomei @spiderstyles04 @sexualparkour @vinaluvsu @domainexpandme @mariadu2 @toterry @taliawz @always-reading @angvl3tears @iloveoldermenn @aesthetic-lyss @lover-girl-estxx @cadhlabear @kaiparkerwifes @herbookgarden @luvleyshif4 @caraxes-syrax @mymultiveres @reader1402 @dinnodallas @darkreymbow @vinaluvsu @sarahskywalker-amidala @christinechickiee @hoelesslyt @tincanhat @scenesofobx @james-bucky-barnackle @angvl3tears @belledawnidk @millietozier @vrsluts @chimmysoftpaws @brathwaite444 @urmanicpixieangelgirl